Honest communication is the cornerstone of any strong relationship, whether personal or professional. For most of us, being truly honest can feel vulnerable, uncomfortable, and fearful of the outcome. And what is equally true is that speaking your truth means you foster trust, respect and enrich all relationships.
In this post, I’m excited to share my 3-step SIT framework for having honest conversations. This approach has helped me navigate difficult discussions with clarity and confidence, and I believe it can do the same for you.
Before we dive into the framework, I want to cover why honest communication is so important.
⬆️ Builds Trust
Honest communication builds trust, laying the foundation for any meaningful relationship. When people know they can count on you to be truthful, it strengthens your connection over time.
🫱🏻🫲🏼 Fosters Respect
Respect is a two-way street. When you’re honest, you show respect for the other person’s intelligence and feelings, and in turn, you’re more likely to receive respect.
💎 Clear communication
Prevents Misunderstandings:** Misunderstandings can lead to unnecessary conflicts and stress. Clear and honest communication ensures that everyone is on the same page, reducing the likelihood of confusion.
I think we all know how important it is to be able to communicate our experiences in a true and and effective way so here is my simple and practical 3-step framework: SIT
S: Set the Scene
The first step in having an honest conversation is to set the scene. This means framing the conversation in a way that prepares both you and the other person for what’s to come.
Consider the time and place, find a moment when both of you are calm and not distracted (probably best to avoid busy public places)
State what your intentions are, be clear about the topic of conversation and explain why you want to talk about it. For example, “I’d like to share how I’ve been feeling about work recently, I want to talk about it because I value our working relationship.”
If it helps you make notes to help the conversation stay on track.
I: Use “I” Statements
When you are talking, as much as possible use “I” over “you”. You want to express your feelings and experience. By focusing on you, you’re taking responsibility for your emotions and encouraging the other person to do the same.
Using “I” statements prevents the conversation from turning into a blame game. For example, instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” reframe to, “I feel unheard when I don’t get a chance to express my thoughts.”
“I” statements are less likely to make the other person defensive, which means they’re more likely to listen and engage.
T: Time
The final step in the SIT framework is to give the other person time to process the conversation. This is often the hardest part because it requires patience and restraint, especially if the other person is upset by what has been aired.
It’s tempting to want a resolution right away. In some cases this may be true and for other times they may need time to process their feelings and come to their own conclusions. Allow them the freedom to process it without trying to change their experience.
There you have it, my SIT framework to navigate even the most challenging discussions with confidence and care so you can have and maintain authentic, healthy and enriched relationships.
Have you had any experiences where honest communication made a difference? I’d love to hear your stories—feel free to share them in the comments below!